El Weeko Tres-o

Week two saw epic failures on my part.  I probably shouldn't have brought M&M's to that birthday party.  Most of them ended up in my mouth, then migrated to parts less desirable.  I ended up gaining a pound.

I ended up getting a horrific sinus/ear infection last week, which knocked me flat for a few days.

Cheat day was an epic day of burgers, beer, and as much candy as I could fit in my big fat hands.

Week three is going well so far, and I'm looking forward to Dim Sum this Saturday!

Mid-week update, differences!

11 days ago on a Sunday, Malia and I went to Trader Joe's and bought food to start the 4-hour body process. As per usual, I spent way too much on (grass-fed) meat and Malia was heavy on the vegetables.

Here is our bounty, guarded by two Humans you may recognize.

Spinach, beans, more beans, organic grass-fed flank steak, pasture-raised eggs, grass-fed ground beef, turkey, Chipotle Garlic salsa (nom!), etc. Also, wine Jesus juice.

We also did a weigh-in and took base-line measurements. It was a starting point, but one I believe it to be artificially high, sincee had spent the preceding 3 days eating like we were in Pompeii and Monday was Volcano Day.

The numbers:

We weighed ourselves at 10pm, fully hydrated and full of tasty, tasty white carbohydrates. It had benefit. The following Saturday morning *6 days later) I weighed myself and had Malia take my measurements (waist at navel, hips, R&L arms and thighs- this was done while still half asleep, before our 30grams of protein).

I had gone from 244.2 lbs. to 235.8 lbs and lost 5 total inches.

I had lost 8.4 pounds and 5 inches in 6 days. Which is INSANE and likely in large part due to the change in hydration levels and the lack of a binge-days worth of food in my gut. The next measurement coming in two days will be more compelling and let me know how I'm really doing.

As much as I realize that the result is artificial, it is encouraging that I can fit in to clothes that were juuuust a little bit too tight the week before. Since this "diet" is really all about reinforcing good habits, I'll take the power-assist in the beginning.

I measured body fat as well using my Omicron (?) weight and body composition scale and the change was so drastic (body fat went UP 2.5%) that the difference can only be attributed to the fact that my hydration level was dramatically different- and my overall electrical impedance was different, thereby skewing the results.

I feel like a whale. A FAIL WHALE ohhoho...

Bwahahahaha, 'fail whale', bahaha...

But srsly, in all srsness, I've kinda fallen off the wagon and it's only week TWO.  Chocolate has been my enemy, and the cold that's coming on is sure to be a challenge.  It's been an unhealthy winter for me as it is, and I seem to keep... getting... sick.  It's also been a stressful winter for me, which probably pushes the sick along.

Confession: chocolate.  Cheating with chocolate the past few days has been awful for my mental state.

I feel like I'm losing

Involved vs. Committed

I'm a nerd. Actually- I'm a geek who also likes nerd things, and there is a distinction that I appreciate but won't go in to right now (lest I start a nerd fight- and there's the slapping, whingeing and strange wheezing noises that you get when out of shape nerds try to get physical).

Background:

I have been "big" all my life. This sucks. Kids are cruel. Adults are cruel. Most girls (and women) don't like guys with shitty self-esteem who are also fat. I was both of these things and- boy howdy!

I lost a bit of weight, got a lot of confidence that comes with age and wisdom and things have been generally OK for about 10 years or so now.

Currently:

Damn am I not now almost 40? I've been in various states of fat from "Very" to "Wow! Have you been working out?". At my highest weight I was 287. At my lowest adult weight I was 220 (after personal training, diet, exercise and the requisite monetary commitment that goes with that).

Two things have worked for me in my life, and these are:

Diet:

The low-carb (F)Atkins diet took me from 287 to 235. I did this for about four years. My bloodwork was stellar, my cholesterol was fantastic, I felt great. I found, however, that it wasn't totally sustainable for me. I had to either eat NO Carbs or I ate ALL the carbs. Moderation with food isn't something I'm good at. If the algorithm is Boolean (go/no go?) Fine- I'm solid!

If the objective is moderation, well, I'm not good at that. "Only have a little bit of X"? No chance of success.

Exercise:

Cycling (and then personal training 2x week) worked well for me. It got me down to below 220 for the first time in my adult life. It was a really hard habit to form and I was getting good at it. Then work exploded four years ago, stress kicked in- and my healthy habits were the first thing to go. followed quickly by my personal organization (but that, as they say, is another blog).

I fell off of the diet and exercise wagon and it's not pretty. Neither am I.

As of the beginning of this Malia and Jonathan Lose weight adventure I am 244lbs. I would really, really like this number to shrink by 20%.

In the course of human events, it comes time to go on a diet. Geek that I am, I am going to look to my friends and see which things they are doing that work for them. I don't have the bandwidth to do the bone-crushing exercise that I did for a year and I have the common sense to not ride my bicycle to (and from) work through the streets of the San Fernando Valley.

The Tim Ferriss' 4-Hour body seems to be a good place to start. I like it because it introduces a few key points that incorporate (oddly enough) parts of my work life (as a process engineer) in to my personal life.

Mainly: "If you don't measure it, you can't manage it." and "Be responsible to someone other than yourself for this."

I don't think I'll be using SPC, Six-Sigma control charts with my weight and body fat (thought I may, and that seems COOL!), but I am in this with Malia, to the bitter, bloody, skinny end!

I have decided to be committed to this process. This way of eating, this way of exercising. Not involved, but committed. You know what the difference is right?

"The difference between being involved and committed is a bacon and egg breakfast. The chicken was involved, the pig was committed."

Blogging about this will help. There will be a lot of mundane posts about my adjustment to the diet and my eventual transition in to his exercise regimen. There will be suggestions. There will even be some recipes. I am going to post my measurements (taken every Saturday morning before our "cheat day" and my weight every time we measure.

I am taking a picture of everything I eat and sending it to my sweety, and she is doing the thing.

Let the Fat-loosing begin!

My favorite microwave 'meal' so far...

Ingrediments:

• Washed and dried baby spinach (Trader Joe's)
• Black beans - I like Trader Joe's cuban style black beans
• Salsa - with no added sugar
• Hard-boiled or scrambled egg or two/grilled chicken
• Guacamole
• Tomato slices (optional)
• Microwavable bowl/Tupperwareish thing (not for eating)

 Directions:

1. Cram a bunch of fresh spinach in the bottom of the bowl.
2. Put some beans on top.
3. If using chicken, put some chicken on top.
4. Put some salsa on top.
5. Lightly cover and microwave for 1:30 on medium-high.
6. Let steam for a bit while you peel the egg and slice the tomato.
7. Top with egg, tomato, and guacamole.
8. Nomz!

One down, 21924833912853192347192378510 to go...

Besides a few moments in the morning when I wanted to do horrible things to Tim Ferriss (and not in a good way), yesterday proved to not be as bad as I thought.  And I'm sure that next week will be better, since I'll have a better handle on the guidelines and much more time to prep meals in advance.

The concept of "30 grams of protein within 30 minutes of waking" is more difficult than I thought, as most of the protein drinks have artificial sweetener and milk in them.  I thought I had solved the problem by hard-boiling 3 dozen eggs for us to share, without realizing that eggs only have 4-6 grams of protein each.  I don't know about you, but I can't eat that many aborted chicken fetuses in one sitting.  I mean, only two fetii at a time, tops.

I had to do an emergency Costco run for pre-cooked chicken:

Giving up artificial sweetener is ROUGH.  I have a pack of gum that I've been working through yesterday and today - mainly because I just bought it and don't want to toss it.  Once I'm finished with it, I'm not buying any more.  Black coffee is a strange thing too, and black coffee without anything sweet feels like punishing myself for something I didn't do (unless this is punishment for being a fat ass).

Over the course of the day I had roughly 12 ounces of black beans, 10 ounces of chicken, 2 hard-boiled eggs, 3 cups of spinach (before cooking), 1 cup lentil soup, 2 tablespoons guacamole, 1/2 cup of salsa, and 1 tomato.  I drank two grande regular brew black coffees, and about 80 ounces of filtered water.

Did an hour of cardio on the elliptical and then went to my friend's yoga class in the evening for an hour.

Got chiro'd and cracked and popped - there's so much tension in my mid thoracic spine, it's been giving me headaches.

Still didn't sleep well.  Bah humbug.  But there's always tonight for sleep.

Oh, and of course...

3:30pm, Day One.

Growing up as a fat kid sucks.

What's worse is growing into a fat adult, with all the self-esteem issues of a fat kid.

I know I'm not enormous. I know I'm not obese. But you know, I'm really tired of working so hard and not getting anywhere.

So... it begins.

I'm just lucky I really like beans.